Title: Because of This
Author: Duchess Curry
Fandom: X-Men
Pairing: Implied Wolverine/Nightcrawler
Summary: Training is torturous for Logan; and so is his life at the moment.
Archive: It's here. But if you can't find it, e-mail me at Duchess_Curry@yahoo.com and I'll send it to you.
Rating: M (currently) for language, sexual situations, and violence
Parts: 12 - ?
Status: WIP
Series/Sequel: :) wait and see
Website: Do you all really think I'm smart enough to run my own website?
Disclaimer: All original X-Men characters belong to the Marvel Entertainment Group. I do not own them, I am just borrowing them for amusement purposes. I do, however, own all original characters which I have made up for the sake of the story (won't list them all, because there's a lot).
Authors notes & Warnings: Sorry this took so long to put up. I know it's been a long time coming. It'll be a little while before the next piece is up.Chapter 12
"Again." Logan demanded. He sprung into action parrying blows; but this time not being able to land any. Panting, the teacher and the student parted; both impressed. "Better."
"You think?" Skye panted.
"Yeah. You're comin' along. Train a lil more and you'll be a great fighter."
Skye grinned, and that said all that it needed to. Logan nodded at him, then turned to the rest of the training gym. Around him, things exploded, people gave up trying to use their abilities and just tackled others, chaos reigned. He shook his head.
"They don't get what's going on, do they?"
Logan shook his head. "No, I don't think so."
Skye stood next to him and surveyed the area with him. "Wish I could tell them."
"But if you did, it would ruin their world." They looked at Iceman who now stood next to them. "It's harsh, but true. They can't know; the rest of the world can't know "
"You sound like Hank." Logan interrupted, rolling his eyes.
Fire blazed from icy eyes. "No, I don't."
"Whatever you say, Mr. Drake."
Maybe if they both weren't so on edge they wouldn't have done it. Maybe if someone other than Remembrance knew that Logan was seven months pregnant they wouldn't have done it. Maybe if Bobby had talked to Beast when they broke up so he could have resolved his feelings; then they wouldn't have done it. Maybe Well maybe a lot of things. But the point is that instead of working out a whole lot of stuff; Bobby jumped at Logan; and Logan let his claws out; and they fought like twelve year old boys in a schoolyard; knocking each other to the ground and hitting each other almost as often as they used their abilities against each other.
Nobody tried to break it up. Nobody even said anything; or even moved while they fought. It seemed unreal to both students and teachers alike. It was like a movie; playing out before them; two of their own fighting each other like there was no tomorrow.
They did hit each other. That's actually what finished the fight. Logan landed a hit directly on Bobby's nose; breaking it, and letting bright red blood flow freely. Bobby pulled back, holding his face in his hands. Logan looked at him; still furious. Bobby looked up and lunged at him, shooting ice daggers at him. Logan stood still; letting them hit him. Red blood stained his shirt.
"STOP IT !!!" Donal screamed out. Everyone looked at him; covering their ears as he screamed on; incomprehensibly. Right before their eyes he rose up about ten feet into the air; then closed his mouth and plummeted back to the ground. He crashed on his first flight; but it was the diversion that everyone needed.
Bobby glared at Logan for another minute; then ran over to Donal; to congratulate him and to make sure that he was alright. But it wasn't enough for Logan. Though the rage inside him subsided a little; something deeper down nagged at him. It was unplaceable; but it was there; and deep down it was eating at him. Logan snarled at the rest of the room; and walk out. As he walked through the cold air; his baggy t-shirt sticking to his bloody, sweaty body his rage grew. By the time he reached the dorm he was so pissed off at the world that instead of opening pulling open the door he sliced it off it's handles.
"Mister Logan; are you alright?"
He looked down at the little blonde girl that looked up at him with eyes full of concern.
"I'm alright Sara."
"Then why did you hurt the door?"
Logan blinked; then blinked again. Looking into Sara's innocent eyes was ripping his heart out. His senses seemed to dim as his emotions took over. A fast voice called to Sara from somewhere that seemed very far away to Logan. She smiled at him then ran off. Logan shakily sat down on the stairs.
"What's wrong with me?" He said quietly to himself as he started to cry into his hands. `I'm the Wolverine The toughest man in Canada; or maybe the world So why the hell is ripping off a door killing me? Hurt it? It's a damn door; it doesn't have feelings And this isn't me '
Logan looked up; his tears immediately stopping. He glared at the white walls that were dotted with pictures of students looking at ease with each other and life it wasn't what Logan needed to see at that moment.
"HEY EVERYONE LOOK AT THIS !!!" Donal's obnoxiously loud voice rang in Wolverine's ears. With a roar his claws came out and he slashed at the pictures; ripping them and tearing some of them down. The pictures of bliss destroyed, Wolverine panted for a minute; his previous fight and his raging emotions were finally making him tired. `But I'm the Wolverine I don't get tired ' With another savage roar, Logan ran up the stairs seeking the solace of his shared room.
Logan stormed down the hall, the squeals of childish voices at Donal's screaming flying aggravated him more. `I just want to lie down where it's quiet and sleep. That's one thing I gotta give her, Mem's been quieter since she realized he was more tired now.' He got outside his room, and was hit by the screaming voices inside it. Twisting the doorknob he let himself in, to face the chaos that now reigned. Chairs had been overturned, trash was all over, empty water bottles littered the floor and beds, clothes spewed out of the closet and drawers; both his and Mem's, which pissed Logan off. It was one thing for her to trash her stuff; but his was another thing.
And amid it all, Remembrance sat on the lower bunk, her face showing her rage. Angel stood next to her, glaring at her; and Nightcrawler was standing not far from them, looking livid and coming closer to shouting than he ever had before.
"You `ave to learn how to channel your ability. If you've gotten into Magneto's head before, you can now."
"But I can't!" Remembrance screamed back at him.
"You aren't even trying" Warren put in.
"Yes I am."
"Zhen vhy aren't you succeeding?"
"Hey!" Logan yelled. All three of them looked at him, realizing for the first time that Logan was there. "What's goin on here?"
"Ve are trying to `elp Remembrance channel her ability to teleport her psychic ability past Magneto's helmet zo "
"Yeah I got that." Logan interrupted. "But how does yelling help you do that?"
"It doesn't." Mem yelled at him, looking up from where her face had been buried in her hands. "That's why I want these pricks to leave so I can learn how to do this on my own."
"Out in the hall now." Logan roared at her. She tilted her head back like a child, and traipsed after him. Logan slammed the door after them. "You can get away with calling me bad things, but not them; they're just trying to help you."
"They'd help me more by leaving me alone."
"I get that. But the Elf has more experience that you do in this; so you might want to listen to him." Their voices kept raising, making her next statement the most dangerous that she had said in a long time.
"You still love him."
It took half a second to sink in. "No Way!"
"Then why defend him? He's fine doing it on his own."
"Shut up Mem!"
"You still love him."
Logan's claws erected themselves under her chin. "I said shut up Mem." They stood there for a while breathing heavily; her pinned by his claws. Slowly they retracted. "Sorry." Wolverine growled. She glared at him and rubbed her neck.
"Whatever. You're super moody lately; can you stop it and go back to the puking please?"
"I can't control it."
"Well then learn how to. Or get some terrible new symptom; like constant farting." Logan blinked; looking at her funny. "Seriously; your moodiness is getting annoying."
"My moodiness "
"Yes your moodiness."
"You know you haven't been so sweet lately. Maybe you're pregnant too." Logan wished he could take it back immediately after he said it. Not because he was accusing Remembrance of being pregnant; but because he added on the `too'. But before either of them could say anything more footsteps echoed down the hall at them; making them part, like some forbidden lover only they had been fighting not fucking.
"Hello?"
"Hey Pietor." Logan said, miserably. He turned toward his friend; but the Russian pushed past him.
"You are Remembrance, yes?" She nodded. "I heard you are a great artist."
"I'm not great." Logan snorted at her response. She glared at him a little.
"Show me your work. Let me judge."
She sized him up; looked back at the door of the room; then looked at him again. "Well if there's one thing I love it's an audience." She took his arm and led him off.
Logan glared at their retreating forms, hearing the door open behind him. Warren looked around; then walked away disgruntled. Logan walked into the room; believing that he finally was going to get the peace he sought. He was wrong.
"Logan, I am vorried about you."
Logan blinked. He'd forgotten Nightcrawler was there. "Oh you are?"
"Yah. You have not been yourzelf lately. You are more moody zhan you normally are and you zeem on edge, almost like you are hiding zomzhing."
Logan swallowed hard and spoke softly and slowly. "I'm just tired Elf. You know this place is more intense than Xavier's. It's just a lot of stuff piling on me."
Nightcrawler got up; and put his hands on Logan's shoulders. "I understand my friend. It iz a wary busy part of the vorld here." He pulled Logan into a quick hug; then let the shocked Logan go. "Get zome zleep; you look like you need it. And please remember, I'm always here to listen." He stepped back and vanished with a crack and a puff of smoke.
Logan crawled up onto his bunk; the cool October air making him glad to pull a thick wool blanket over him as the early afternoon sun hit his face. `He doesn't know. He doesn't remember. Does he? Naw; he couldn't. He was too drunk.' Logan sighed, his back aching. He shifted onto his side, staring out of the window. He knew that his clothes were getting a little snug at the waist. `I'm not showing; and I probably won't really. The kid's more toward my back; I know that much But I wish it didn't have to kill my back. Thought my healing would have taken care of that. Guess ' Logan's thoughts trailed off as he fell asleep.
Chapter 13
"Hey, get up." Logan felt a pillow hit his face. He blinked a little, then carefully sat up.
"Hey, what time is it?"
"A little after nine."
"Nine!" Logan yelped, sitting up faster and hitting his head on the ceiling. Rubbing it he said "I should remember about that by now."
"Ya think?" Mem said smirking at him. Logan's stomach rumbled. "Before you complain, here." She held a fast food bag out to him. Logan had to grin roguishly at it.
"Thanks."
"Welcome." Mem said; then turned her attention elsewhere.
Logan bit into the burger, savoring the greasy flavors. "Where'd ya get this?"
"I went out." Logan rolled his eyes at the typical non- answer.
"Where out?" No answer. Logan sighed and lay down again.
"Know what tomorrow is?"
"Nope."
"Want to?"
"Nope."
"Logan, I know you're pregnant but you don't have to be so difficult. Oh wait, I forgot, you're supposed to be like this all the time."
Logan's claws came out as he sat up quickly; knocking his head on the ceiling again. "Oww." He complained, laying back down. "Fine! What's tomorrow?" He growl-yelped, then rubbed his head.
"It's Halloween." Mem said, almost sarcastically.
"It is?" He watched her nod, then looked back at the ceiling. "Damn."
"What?"
"Halloween's shit."
"No, it's not."
"Yeah, it is."
"Halloween is the one day of the year that the dead can come back to life."
"Kid, I'm a whole lot older than you, and believe me, the dead don't come back to life."
She shook her head a little, arms crossed over her chest. "Just because you haven't seen something doesn't mean that it doesn't exist."
Logan started to say something, but stopped, and came up with the lame argument "Halloween's stupid."
"No it's not. It's my favorite holiday."
"Halloween's just a stupid holiday meant for little kids."
Mem looked up at him scornfully. "You're getting fat." Logan glared down at her. The lights flicked off, and he heard the bedsprings creak. Logan turned to the wall breathed deeply as silent tears fell into his pillow. `What the fuck's wrong with me?' A soft voice rang through his head. `You're pregnant. Get used to it.' It was hard for Logan to fall asleep. He knew that he had a lot invested in one person; it had been a long time since he had done so. His guilt stopped his sleep.
"Sorry." He said into the darkness; but got no response.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The next morning dawned pale and cool. Logan didn't wake to it. He was too tired, and too comfortable to care. A puff of smoke and a slightly sulfuric smell appeared with a person in the room, late in the morning.
"Logan. Logan my friend, it iz time to get up." Logan shook his head a little, and inhaled deeply.
"Yeah, I'm up."
"But you are not out ov bed." Logan sat up slowly.
"What time is it."
"A quarter past ten."
"Fuck." Logan slid to the floor, and finally realized who was watching him. Logan stared at him for a moment. "I gotta go to the bathroom."
Logan not only pissed, but also puked. Splashing cool water onto his face he looked into the mirror. `He doesn't know. He didn't remember. He doesn't know.'
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The sunset, and Halloween night bloomed into it's dark splendor. But as always it was lost on Wolverine. He'd hated Halloween for as long as he could remember; and the kids of the school's over-enthusiasm did nothing to help him. He wandered around the black and orange decorated town, where the school's wizened elders had left pubescent mutants to run amuck amid the other, normal, children. Just the thought of the amount of trouble they were likely to cause gave Wolverine a headache. He leaned against a lamppost, and watched the mock chaos around him.
"There's a lot to it, isn't there?" Logan looked to his left, and saw Skye there, looking around. "I hate it too." Logan had to smile to himself, and followed Skye's gaze, seeing a group from the school entering a haunted house that the town had set up.
"Think they're going to cause trouble?"
"Maybe."
Logan sighed a little and started to traipse after them.
The inside of the old Victorian house was very dimly lit, and had assorted rubber and cloth novelty items hanging around in it. The hall was dusty; the dining room was set for a monster's dinner; hanging ghosts floated in the living room Logan rolled his eyes. "This is cheesy."
"My thoughts exactly" someone upstairs whispered, grinning deviantly.
"What?"
"Nothing, just wait for my cue."
"Okay."
Logan followed a group of middle school aged kids through another hall, and looked around as they started up the stairs to the second floor. He shook his head `They must have gotten bored here too and went out back.' Logan started toward the kitchen, but the sounds of pounding feet and screams made him run back to the stairs. He was almost stampeded by ten and eleven year olds as they rushed for the door. Above him, Logan heard extremely loud cackling. His eyes narrowed as his claws came out and he charged up the stairs.
A huge black thing flew at his head. Logan ducked, cursing in his head. When he had a moment, Wolverine leapt up and slashed at the light bulb, cutting it and plunging the dim room into darkness.
"Great, `o's the idiot '
``o burst the light?" `Twins' Logan thought, as he crept on the old floor.
"Not me!" A young, male voice shrieked. `Donal; the only one who can get that loud.' Logan thought, and leaned against the wall. Logan looked up, and didn't have to match a voice to a person to know that Breaker was there. Wolverine rolled his eyes. `This is getting ridiculous' he didn't bother to try to figure out who else was there. `I think these guys need some tricks themselves.'
Wolverine ducked a little more, and rolled as an army man would.
"What was that?" A slightly freaked out voice asked. Logan grinned to himself. `It's just me Donal.' He thought, smirking. He crept along the floorboards, found an open door, and went it; slamming it behind him. Wolverine winced a little at the yelps he heard, and tried hard not to laugh.
"Aye told you this place was haunted."
"It's not!" The twin voices yelled back.
"Then what made that door slam?"
"Prob Probably j j just the w wind." Breaker stammered.
"Then you go open the door." Donal screeched.
"Why don't you?"
In the yelling Wolverine heard their fear, and relished it. Licking his lips, he opened and banged the door shut again.
"That wasn' the wind!"
He heard footsteps trying to be quiet as they approached the door. Logan hid behind a large sofa that was covered with a dust sheet. He noticed an open window, and decided to put it to good use. The door creaked open, and Wolverine heard the hall's occupants' breath quicker. `Their already freaked out Good. Now all I gotta do is scare them a little so they don't do shit like this again.'
Wolverine didn't dare look up and give himself away. The room was ready to freak out it's occupants enough itself. As the group walked, the floor creaked. Logan knew that Breaker was walking along the ceiling, and knew it was just a matter of time before Tinkle. Tinkle. Tinkle Breaker hit the chandler, making the glass baubles on it hit each other. Logan smiled as he heard Breaker's body hit the floor, and smelled the cloud of dust that rose to catch him. At the thud, the other boys jumped.
"This place really is haunted." One more young voice cracked. `Aaron Depleach. I should have known he'd be with Donal.' Logan thought. Some one moved, and the floor creaked again Logan could feel them shiver. `Now's my chance.' He moaned softly.
That single, unexplainable noise managed the move from freak- out to full on scared. Screaming like little girls, the boys all stampeded out. Wolverine chuckled to himself, and stood. `That was fun. Maybe there is something to this Halloween stuff.' Logan looked out the window, and seeing no one around, climbed out of it, then down a near-by tree.
Wolverine headed back to the school, tired of the constant demands on his time and ability. He past the LeBeau boys on the street, flinging insults and things at each other as they fought over Halloween candy. Wolverine shook his head. He was even tired of these fights; amusing though they were. `I'm just tired off all of this. There's nothing new here; just constantly teaching, and planning, and constant panic that someone else will discover what's happening to me. There's nothing new. No excitement. It's boring here.'
These thoughts trailed along with Wolverine as he walked over the vast yards, and up into the building he lived in. He thought about leaving, though he knew that more than anything else he would disappoint the Professor if he left. Scott hadn't been able to take it, and had left in September to go back to his family. Logan rolled his eyes at the thought, and opened the door.
The room was dark, and he flicked on the light. There, necking in the dark, were Kevin and Mem.
"Son of a Bitch!" Logan swore out loud. The two snapped out of their passionate embrace, and looked over at him; startled. "I am not seeing this!"
"What the hell are you doing back here?"
"I could ask you the same thing."
"It's my room, I have every right to be here."
"Yeah, but he shouldn't be."
"I'm not even going to dignify that. Come on Kevin, let's get outta here."
Logan watched them both go; still dressed in costumes. Kevin in dark clothes and vampire's fangs, and Mem in short, skimpy clothes and dark butterfly wings. He felt a little guilty for throwing them out. `Damn. I hate having pregnant emotions.' "Bitch." He muttered and slammed the door.
Chapter 14
Logan tried to apologize the next day, but Remembrance wouldn't let him. `Fine! If she wants to be stupid like that, let her.' Wolverine didn't see too much of her after that. She started sleeping in her studio, and gods only know where else. Logan didn't mind. He was tired, and more moody than usual. His morning sickness had started to come back in full force, and every morning he woke early to puke his brains out. Because of this, he didn't mind the lack of roommate.
The three weeks that there were still students at the school passed quickly. Because they were emptying the school, making it ready for attack in December, there were big tests to be graded, and arrangements to be made, and goodbyes to be said, and even some presents exchanged. A few days before Thanksgiving, the school emptied. Students who had homes to go to went to them. The rest piled into the Blackbird with Hank and the rest, and headed to the house that Xavier built. Logan was supposed to wait two days, then follow with the older student-teachers who were staying behind to train a little more. But when the time came, Logan had to face an unexpected problem.
"Remembrance, just get in, and we'll go."
"No! I know I've told you before. I hate Charles Xavier, and I'm not going."
"Wait. If she's not, I'm not." Kevin stood in the plane's doorway as he spoke.
Logan rolled his eyes at the female that stood before him with her arms crossed over her chest. "Fine!" He shouted, throwing up his hands. "Do whatever you two want. I'm leaving." And so he did, thinking `After today, I don't have to come back here ever again. I've been here longer than Xavier told me I would be, and I've been through more here than I planned on. I just want to go back to the mansion, lock myself in my room, and have my kid in piece without having to deal with that little bitch; or dealing with worrying about the Elf figuring it out.'
The mini-jet landed an hour later in it's hidden port at the mansion. There waiting for them, was Charles Xavier. Logan was the last off the plane. He stared at his friend, and stood over him. Somewhere in the back of his mind, Wolverine realized that he didn't hear Jubilee's usual shrieks when he got home. But that didn't matter.
"Yes Logan, I know that we need to talk. Outside, right now alright by you?" Logan nodded, feeling more surly than usual.
One rolled, and the other walked. The cold November air bit at Logan's exposed skin. He pulled his old jacket tighter around himself, then realizing that when he did so that anyone could recognize his extra weight, and since the Prof was the Prof, Logan knew that he would ask why And Logan didn't want to talk about it. He relaxed his grip on himself, and kept walking.
"I have to thank you Logan, for taking on the task of teaching them. You really did a wonderful job."
"Yeah, sure."
"Yes you did. Look around you Logan. With your help, two brothers found each other, and now get along. Storm has learned to accept women being lesbians, and men being gay. Hank has realized what he really has now compared to what he had in the past. Angel has learned to appreciate those around him for what they are, and has actually talked to people who he would rather have believed dead. Scott has realized how much he really loves his family. And from what I've heard, you helped Donal Cassidy learn to fly, and Iceman learn how to love. You put a smart-mouthed young man in his place, and taught him that there's many worse things than what he can do." Logan looked around him into the cold air. `Have I made that much of a difference?' "And from what I've heard, you've taken a certain young woman who seems to believe herself the most amazing person in the world down a notch or two." Logan looked at Charles and realized he was smiling at him. Logan smiled back, a slight warm feeling spreading through him. "From what I've heard, you've inspired many people, and given them hope that they can win against Magneto when he attacks their school. You've become a leader for them." Logan almost swelled with pride. It was good to be complimented instead of being screamed at by people. But Charles continued. "I need you to finish the task I gave to you Logan. I know that you don't want to, and there is no reason why you should. But I believe that by now you have figured out the personal reason that I have not to go. And I believe that you understand that if I go, things could get more out of control than is necessary."
"She really hates you."
"I know." Charles sighed. "Logan will you take on the task again? I know that it is unfair to ask it of you, but "
"I'll do it Charles."
"Logan, you "
"I said I'll do it. Don't make me take it back."
"Thank you Logan." The Prof was silent for a moment, then said "Anytime you want to talk about anything Logan, I'm here." Then he started to wheel away.
"Hey Charles " the Prof turned and looked back at Logan, questioningly. "How much do you know?"
"About what?"
Logan shook his head a little. "About nothing."
"I'm not her Logan, I won't read your mind unless I have to. Things are easier if you tell me what is wrong."
"There's nothing wrong." Charles nodded, and rolled away as Logan thought to himself `I only wish I could believe that